The Epiphany Issue
Romance, Glamour, and Other Terrible Influences
Romance, Glamour, and Other Terrible Influences
Raised By A Movie That Wouldn’t Make It Past A Modern Ratings Board
Dive deep. Don’t shout out the first thing that comes to mind. Outside of or paired with the way your parents raised you, what book has had the most influence on your life? Or how you’ve behaved? Maybe it wasn’t a book, but a movie.
Little Women? Pippi? Nancy Drew?
Is it a book like Heidi that takes a young reader’s emotions to tears and teaches them deep compassion? A first understanding of our parents’ mortality and our own privilege of having them, or unique empathy if we didn’t.
Maybe it was the story of The Secret Garden, which let us imagine beautiful places of solace and transformation.
Why were these amazing books centered on orphaned children? Disney did the same. As an author, one has to wonder, was there a hidden fantasy in these stories, or laziness to avoid writing more characters and relationships? This is a fascinating digression that maybe we’ll pick up again in another newsletter. But this is not today’s conversation.
In my latest manuscript, One of Us Must Die, the main character is in a terrible marriage with a despicable husband. It’s a new twist on how a woman falls into his trap, and how far she will go to free herself. Like Not Yours to Keep, the real underlying exploration is of how our parents raised us impacts who we become, the people we choose, and how we parent. In an interview with Author Confessions, I answered why that topic fascinates me by saying human behavior intrigues me. True. But through recent events in my life, an epiphany came like a Glinda bubble floating down and revealing itself.
Each of the books mentioned above had a deep emotional impact. But it was the movies that changed the future. It began with the movie Lili starring Leslie Caron. I was too young to understand many of the themes of the musical movie (yes, I’m old enough to remember life before strict movie ratings), but Lili was an orphan (ahem) who navigated a harsh world looking for love. Leslie Caron was captivating. But it was her movie Gigi that altered the trajectory of my life. A young, tomboyish French girl who needed to be taught feminine wiles, to dress properly, to capitulate to her man, keep him happy even if his loyalty was to himself. The costumes, the ambiance and the 1900 high society world exuded romance and glamour. It made a little girl want to be French.
In hindsight, it also inadvertently taught a little girl that men’s needs come before hers. Society supported that image. A woman wasn’t complete unless she had a husband. Her job was to make him happy and raise his children. Her needs and mutual respect—insignificant. You’d think society has evolved, now that women have achieved their independence and power. But take a truly good look at your friends. How many can you count whose confidence was squished, who struggle to make a decision without conferring with their partner, who live in fear of upsetting them? Who were fooled into a toxic relationship? Did they get there because of how they were parented, or was it the influence of a fictional character they wanted to emulate? It could be something else entirely, but it’s so easy for smart, intelligent, good women to slip into the trap. And exploring why, while difficult, was psychologically intriguing to write about.
Whoo, geez, that got deep and dark real quick.
I Read It:
Lisa Jewell’s recent book, Don’t Let Him In, also explores how easily women fall for narcissistic, despicable men. She was much braver than I and delved into the narcissist’s perspective, while I could only try to kill mine.
Don’t Let Him In FINAL SCORE:
23 READING DAYS - 🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴LIFE INTERRUPTUS = 2-1/2 ACTUAL READING DAYS
The rating scale: Take the number of days to read, subtract all of life’s responsibilities, obligations, fun, and a few hours of sleep each night, and this clever, mind-blowing thriller scores a 2-1/2 day read!
🚨Price Drop Alert🚨
🎧Available on all major audiobook platforms🎧
And Now For Something Completely Serious…
Is An Aneurysm Contagious?
Imagine you’re a few months into your recovery from brain surgery and you get a call. It’s an old friend. You’ve been out of touch for decades. This is a surprise. Only a few people knew you had an aneurysm, and fewer knew you had surgery, because you don’t go on Facebook with the caption ‘bomb in my head…feeling amazing.’ It wasn’t a secret; it was, well, a lot.
What grapevine this friend was on is unclear, but you appreciate the goodwill when you hit accept call. Except, she’s not calling about you. She needs an ear, a shoulder to lean on because a mutual friend had a ruptured brain aneurysm and is in serious condition. It had happened six months before, the month after your own surgery in fact, but the friend’s family kept it a secret. No one should know their adult child might never be the same. You breathe in deeply, hold it, trying not to say stupid things about these kinds of secrets. What is it about brain injuries or neurological conditions that makes people ashamed and hide? But the friend is telling you. Why? She isn’t sure. You tell her about your aneurysm and surgery, and if you’d been together in person, you’d both probably be wide-mouthed and stare at one another for countless speechless minutes. You are states away from each other—in limbo—holding someone else’s secret.
Five months later, as a volunteer for raising awareness about brain aneurysms and research, you walk a 5K for the cause. There’s an inexplicable urge to break away from your group, and even though you’re not a runner, your pace quickens to a trot. Picking up speed, your phone rings. Who answers their phone in the middle of a 5K? But it’s the friend with whom you are keeping secrets. With great trepidation, you answer, expecting them to deliver terrible news.
There are two voices on the line. The other is the mutual friend who is still battling a long, hard recovery from a horrible brain aneurysm rupture. She knows you know and wants to connect. Now. Right in the middle of a 5K fundraiser for brain aneurysms.
To be continued…stick around for the next issue of Sometimes Snarkastic
Last Licks
Strudel the Doodle’s Bark Club Book Recommendations:
“You’ll devour Lisa Jewell’s Don’t Let Him In…just like I did.”
🐾 DNF. Zero regrets.
Any suggestions for her next Bark Club victim? 🐾📚